I seem to have picked up an influx of “yeah” men lately. These are the types of men who give nothing to the fantasy AT ALL - not in the beginning (which I don’t mind) or in the middle (which gives me at least some sort of hope) or at the end (which helps me understand if they had a good time at least!). It is … with out a doubt… the most frustrating thing ever, and after 2 years I have finally reached my breaking point. *sigh*

I think if you are reading this blog, you are one of my callers who knows me fairly well. Yeah - we can debate the word “know” and how well do you really know me, etc. etc. but I’m using “know” in a general sense of the word. You may not “know” me in the bibical sense of the word, but you know my little quirks and pet peeves, and you know what gets me off, and what kinds of books I enjoy reading. In the familiar sense of the word “know” you “know” me. What is the one thing I just can not for the life of me tolerate? Besides spiders? (taps fingers against the desk waiting for the right answer…) EXACTLY! I hate SILENCE during phone calls. There are a few exceptions to the rules - and you all know who you are - but for the most part if you are able to have and hold a conversation with me, you best open up your mouth and communicate. It’s not that I think you’re working for me and that I don’t know my place in the phone sex workforce fantasy or anything - I just really need input/feedback/direction so that I know where I’m going and if I’m going in the right direction and if I’m even in the right state! If you let me know what is going on in the beginning of the call - and gently (and quietly if need be) give me a few destinations, I’ll be fine. Honest. I have a really great imagination. I can create things so elaborate that I surprise myself sometimes. I admit that at times I really am horny, too, so I prefer to create fantasies that we both can share and get off on. I just figure it’s better that way. But this weekend I had about 3 callers who really said nothing for the entire length of the call. I literally had to speak to myself for 20 minutes of one call, forcing questions onto the participant (laughing at the word by the way because he wasn’t one!) and going no where quick. I finally just put my head back and moaned for the last 5 minutes praying to the phone sex princess that the call be over. I know this is not the type of thing one wants to read on Monday. I’m probably sinking quickly with my less than popular post on Sarah Palin (Pallin?) and now this one reminding you all of the ills of my “job” - but I had to do it. Because after this I will no longer mention it. Right now it is written forever in CeCe’s Kingdom that silent callers will be dismissed of unless prior arrangements have been made. PLEASE NOTE THAT IF I HAVE BEEN TALKING TO YOU FOR THE PAST YEAR OR TWO AND YOU WOULD CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE OF THE SILENT NATURE - THIS POST IS NOT FOR YOU! If I have spoken to you for the past year - months - 2 years - somethin like that, don’t even worry. We “work” together if you’re silent or don’t talk a lot. Usually this means that you’ve written to me before hand and explained your fantasy to me, your situation or whatever, and we have worked it out. Please don’t get all sensitive on me and think that I mean you in this post. I do not! The people that need to read this probably aren’t anywhere near my journal. Which renders this post pointless. But I will continue and say that I am going to start blocking silent callers who give nothing to the fantasy/experience. I’m not the flirt for you. I will physically come through the phone and shake you awake, and I’m not violent. Often. You gotta say somethin to play with me, boys. If you’re not into talking - then please take a look around my site and click on the “custom recording” section. That is what you’ll want. A custom recording. That way you can sit and be silent and not irritate me. I gotta do something so I don’t go insane. “So… what do you get into?” “anything.” “Um - so what were you wanting to speak about tonight - what gets you off?” “Oral sex”. “Oh! Great. Well… let’s do a role play then! Maybe I should be the next door neighbor or something and I can come over because I want to use your pool and…” (silence) “How does that sound…? ” Silence…then a faint “ok.” “Alright then. Um - I’m going to knock on your door now… do you want me to just tell you the story or do you want to play along?” Silence. “Hello?” Silence. “Hello?!” “Yeah?” “Hon - are you not in a place where you can talk?” Silence.

You get the picture.

Speaking of custom recordings … I’m going to be doing one later today (I keep postponing it, hon…sorry!)for a new client of mine. I am so excited. I know that you all can’t speak to me as often as you’d like with things being the way they are in the world…so I’d like to offer the recordings as a gentle weaning of sorts. You can have me in your ear whenever you’d like for a fraction of the price. If you have something specific JUST for you - then custom is what you want. The price will be a bit more - but we can discuss it and come to an agreement. If it’s something general then I can create the recording and set it up on my website where others might enjoy it too. You’ll pay a bit less than you would for a custom - but you’ll still have something that will excite you and tide you over for the twice a month call allowance you’ve put yourself on. *wink*. For those of you who miss me due to my schedule change, this may also be an option for you. You can find the form to fill out by clicking on the “recording” button above in the menu. And for the love of all that is good and holy, if you really are not a great communicator on the phone and can not bring yourself to write a note to me and explain your fantasy to me - or a list of things you’d like me to say/do to help YOU get off, then you may want to consider putting in a request for a custom recording. I promise you I will not be driving you crazy by asking you if you like something - or if you are still there - or to speak or anything like that in the recording. I pretty much know I’ll be speaking to myself and I can sit back and weave myself into a great little fantasy for you. I will enjoy myself - and won’t have to block you for being difficult and driving me to drink. Deal?

This is CeCe - and I approve this message.

You know … the thing about a blog is I can pretty much say whatever I want to here and I don’t ever have to listen to any other opinion other than my own. Sure, there is the comments thing - which is a place for Tiffy to say hello, give me quick reminders and funny anecdotes, rant a little and rave a lot, etc, but mostly I find it’s a haven, a sort of opium den for the fuckin terrorists that really DO affect my way of life and we actually CAN do something about but no one really cares about the poor bloggers: SPAM. I would post all the spam I get in a day for your enjoyment but then I’d just get more spam because the spy agents are hiding in my computer like Tom did in mission impossible, you know, from the damn ceiling and shit, ready to descend upon my blog at any mention of erectile dysfunction, drug references, or any mention of horses which apparently is some damn key word in the spam community for bestiality. Seriously - it sucks to high heaven. This paragraph alone has set me up for at least 100 spam messages that will have to be deleted immediately followed by a exorcism by a Priest and an eye wash from all the incredible smut I’ve ingested through my optic disc. I kid you not. But I digress - A LOT. What I meant to say was that my comments can be easily deleted so I don’t even have to entertain another point of view in my comment section, either. This blog, simply put, is not a democracy. It is the Kingdom CeCe and what I say goes with out argument. It’s high time I realized that, huh?

I’m sort of kidding.

But I would like to talk about the debate. Yeah. I’m going to talk about politics. I’m also going to allow for comments and I’ll actually post them with out editing them into something permissible in the Kingdom CeCe which is, you should be aware of, extremely Democratic in a Aristocratic type of way. Adjusts her crown. So then. Let’s begin.

I learned a lot of things today in the debate thanks to my good friend Sarah (Can I call you Sarah?)- Madam Librarian. I got schooled on the first Article and that she’d really like to change the constitution because according to her, she needs more responsibility heaped onto her shoulders. Perhaps in an attempt to get to know what exactly the President’s job is and to get some “hands on” experience. She and Dick can get together and rewrite the constitution, specifically the 1st article, and then while they are in there searching around for things to improve upon, they can write up some stuff defining the good ole constitution of marriage because we all know people in Washington have the knowledge to define that institution much better than any of us ever could. Oh - and the church can do that, too… right after they define healthy sexuality.

I learned that per Sarah - if you vote for something on the Senate floor and your name is Biden or Obama - you’re “fake” and are out of touch with the American People and are just voting across party lines or according to your party for no other apparently good reason. But if you’re McCain and you vote against something that may make you look like an asshole - or FOR something that may make you look like an even bigger asshole, it’s because HE knows something that the American people do not know - namely the rest of the f’n bill/piece of legislature, like, for example, “deadlines” and “hidden messages” of what the bill was REALLY going to accomplish if passed. So yeah - apparently only McCain can vote against something for good reason and be respected for that while the good ole Demo’s voting records are just (pardon the pun) black and white.

I learned that per Sarah - being a part of a family that is “diverse” is just as good as, I don’t know, visiting another country, speaking to your contingents, and um - knowing what is contained in the first Article.

I learned that per Sarah looking back and pointing fingers gets you nowhere, unless of course you’re looking back and pointing fingers and bringing up the voting records of your opponents. Gotcha.

I learned that per Sarah - a debate means avoiding every g.d. question thrown at you and discussing in some vacant pageant way everything that makes you … well, you. And God Bless You, Sarah P. *wink* *smile* *nod* *adjusts crown*

I learned that there are a lot of people who buy this woman’s … spiel…and that they are growing in number apparently, no matter how much she f’s up. But ya know what? I’m not fooled, Madam Librarian Soccer Mom. But I love your glasses.

I will seriously up and move to Canada if the majority of the country I have called “home” votes this woman in. That is how much I despise and hate her. Not even Tina Fey’s accurate description and mockery of her can keep me here…and I love me some Tina Fey! I know it’s not “nice” to hate anyone…and I realize that despise is a strong word, my only regret is that there isn’t a word that is stronger because I would use it. I am seriously up and moving to Canada. And that is saying a lot, because I have been to Canada. I lived 45 minutes from Canada’s border, and I spent a good 3-4 days in Canada and lived to tell about it. Canadians are special people, but I would learn to adapt. I would even learn French, and then wait a lifetime for the Dr. I could finally afford under their Universal Health plan. I would learn to love bacon on my pizza, and the funny thin quarters that get mixed up with Chucky Cheese tokens. I would ride around in the funny buses, eat a lot of maple syrup, and learn to say ‘eh after everything I said. It would be an adjustment, but I wouldn’t have to fear every heartbeat of McCain’s that would bring Sarah P. closer to running the country. Of course she feels that government should just get out of the way - so maybe she would just sleep at the white house and do nothing while the people took back power and ran themselves.

Oh - and I also learned that if you spread press about how horrible Sarah is at debating, and how a victory will be if she doesn’t fuck up too bad, while spreading rumors at the same time about how wonderful Biden is at the art of debate - you can pretty much secure a win for Sarah, even if she stares blankly at the camera and drools, while assuring that unless Biden mops the floor up with her ass he is just mediocre at best. I haven’t seen so much spinning since that one time in Michael Mahoney’s basement with the bottle and half of my Jr. High School Classmates.

I won’t mention politics on my blog again. I might have committed NF suicide by speaking out so passionately against a particular party, but let me just state for the record it’s so not even Party lines right now. I didn’t particularly go for the Billary team. I actually was heard saying I would rather vote for McCain than her…but ya know what? I would have changed my vote the minute I ‘met’ Sarah and voted for Billary - and I really did not like her AT ALL. I love that lady right about now. She and Bill would have made a lovely team. Kinda like the old days.

I’m done. Forgive me. Just blame it on my being young, unless you agree with me, and then call me and tell me how brilliant I am. Or hell, just spin it in whatever way suits your best interest. We all should be really good at that after this election.